A responsible health and fitness blogger would write about this new research out of England claiming that inactivity isn't the cause of childhood obesity or the US government's apparent opposition to GMO food labeling or even the fact that it took the International Association of Athletic Federations 11 months to figure out that ironically-named, 19-year-old track star Caster Semenya doesn't have a penis.
But instead, I'm going to write about the Candwich.
In theory, money manager Travis L. Wright collected $145 million from investors hoping to strike it rich in real estate. Instead, he sank the money in an assortment of weird endeavors, including entrepreneur Mark Kirkland's solid food in a beverage container, the Candwich, which featured the slogan, “Quick & Tasty, Ready to Eat.”
But then Wright got caught. It looks like the only thing going into the can is him.
Why am I telling you about this? Primarily because I delight in sharing the hideous ways humankind manages to twist and distort the concept of "food," and this one tops the charts. It's not like Kirkland wants to can lean turkey with tomato, lettuce, and sprouts on whole grain. Look at the cans. And despite being vacuum-packed in environment-hindering and Alzheimer's-inducing aluminum, I'm fairly certain all manner of preservatives need to be added to a peanut butter and jelly sandwich to give it anything resembling a shelf-life.
These things make Lunchables look like manna from heaven. Therefore, I salute Mr. Wright for thoroughly messing up the launch of this product. I sleep a little better tonight knowing that the day my daughter begs me for canned sandwiches has been delayed.
Keep the faith, Travis. I'm sending you a nice care package of Spam and Cheez Whiz.
I'm at a loss for words here....This very rarely happens, but......Really? Canned sandwich? I couldn't imagine opening up a CAN and there's a sandwich in there and then thinking it's a good idea to put it in my mouth. Absolutely not....
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