All the benefits of wine - without the wine.

I could practically hear the cheering coming from Napa Valley yesterday morning when I read this article in Science Blog:

As strange as it sounds, a new research study published in the FASEB Journal (http://www.fasebj.org), suggests that the “healthy” ingredient in red wine, resveratrol, may prevent the negative effects that spaceflight and sedentary lifestyles have on people. The report describes experiments in rats that simulated the weightlessness of spaceflight, during which the group fed resveratrol did not develop insulin resistance or a loss of bone mineral density, as did those who were not fed resveratrol.

Resveratrol is a phytonutrient found in the skin of red grapes and a few other fruits that studies show can potentially fight cancer, inflammation, and aging. In fact, at this rate, researchers will probably discover that, if you consume enough resveratrol, you can play Rachmaninov's Symphony #2 in E minor and poop 24 carat gold.

But before y'all start mainlining Two Buck Chuck for the 4th of July weekend, I need to point out two things. First, all the resveratrol in the world won't do you a lick of good if you blow your hand off with an M80 because you were drunk when lighting the family fireworks. Second, as I stated before, resveratrol comes from the skin of red grapes - which is to say, it's already plentiful and bioavailable before fermentation. There's also a fair bit of it in blueberries and peanuts. All three of these foods have considerable more nutrient value than a glass of Pinot.

There's plenty of viable research showing that moderate alcohol consumption has its benefits, but don't be one of those goofballs who's all, "The only reason I drink is for my health." Hogwash. If you're looking for phytonutrients, eat fruit and come clean to the fact that you drink because it tastes good, it's fun, and it takes the edge off. There's no resveratrol in beer, so I'd be better off drinking a glass or two of wine - but I don't. I drink beer. You know why? Cuz I like it.

Happy Independence Day, my fellow 'Mericans. Relax and have a glass or two of wine - just don't blow any appendages off. However, if you start crapping out any precious metals, I insist on some kind of commission.