Big, Evil Tuna in the News

Sorry, Charlie! Last week it was announced that the "Big Three" tuna packers settled a lawsuit accusing them of not putting enough canned tuna in their canned tuna. From the Associated Press:

San Diego-based Bumble Bee Foods LLC and Tri-Union Seafoods LLC, and Pittsburgh-based StarKist Co. agreed to pay $3.3 million in the settlement without any admission of wrongdoing, said San Diego County District Attorney Bonnie M. Dumanis.

The probe found the companies failed to meet federal standards for tuna in cans relative to ingredients such as vegetable broth and added flavors, Dumias said.

Tri-Union makes Chicken of the Sea.

I've long placed Big Tuna somewhere between Big Tobacco and The Borg on the Real Fitness Nerd Evil-o-Meter for a number of reasons. Primarily because they tend to use practices that kill other sealife by the thousands, switching only when they get caught. Dolphins, for example. Furthermore, they make their pathetic attempts to do right by the environment into limp PR exercises. Case in point, according to HealthyTuna.com, a site set up by Big Tuna, the three companies “have committed $100,000 per year to protect sea turtles in the long-line tuna fishery.” 100k, huh? Congrats. You contributed your CEO’s gardening bill to a vaguely beneficial cause. I gave a homeless guy a dollar the other day. When do I get my white scarf from the Dalai Llama?

If you want to do some good for the world, Tunanators, try telling us where the tuna you sell comes from. The fishing industry is wildly divergent in terms of fishing practices. Tuna fishing is particular dynamic, ranging from troll and pole-caught Pacific skipjack, which is a sustainable fishery, to the straight-across-the-board, completely overfished Atlantic bluefin.

But you're not going to figure out what tuna you're eating when you tuck into a Big Tuna sandwich, or where it comes from, because they've managed to sidestep US Mandatory Country of Origin labeling laws simply by processing their tuna to the point that it's no longer 100% tuna. From the USDA website:

Processed Food Item - Processed food items are exempted from labeling by the statute. Processed food item means: a retail item derived from a covered commodity that has undergone specific processing resulting in a change in the character of the covered commodity, or that has been combined with at least one other covered commodity or other substantive food component (e.g., chocolate, breading, tomato sauce), except that the addition of a component (such as water, salt, or sugar) that enhances or represents a further step in the preparation of the product for consumption, would not in itself result in a processed food item. Specific processing that results in a change in the character of the covered commodity includes cooking (e.g., frying, broiling, grilling, boiling, steaming, baking, roasting), curing (e.g., salt curing, sugar curing, drying), smoking (hot or cold), and restructuring (e.g., emulsifying and extruding).  

Examples related to this exemption would be fish sticks, surimi, mussels in tomato sauce, seafood medley, coconut shrimp, soups, stews, and chowders, sauces, pates, smoked salmon, marinated fish fillets, canned tuna, canned sardines, canned salmon, crab salad, shrimp cocktail, gefilte fish, sushi, breaded shrimp, breaded chicken tenders, teriyaki flavored pork loin, roasted peanuts, and fruit medley.

In other words, if you fill your food item with enough junk, you're no longer accountable for its quality. It makes sense, actually. Anyone dumb enough to think they'll get nutritional value from something called "fruit medley" has another thing coming, but still, the regulations are kind of bullshit.

Big Tuna typically "processes" their tuna by adding veggie broth. Ta da! Perfectly legal mystery fish! But what this recent lawsuit brings to light is that they've taken their creepy deception and raised with an even creepier deception. Not only are they avoiding telling us where the tuna comes from, they're also trying to avoid the tuna entirely by filling the can with as much broth as possible. Well done, gentlemen. Richard Nixon would be proud.

So what's a canned fish connoisseur to do? Simple. Stay away from Big Tuna. Personally, I'm a fan of Trader Joe's canned salmon, which is clearly labeled as being wild-caught from Alaska. It costs more than Chicken of the Bumble Star, but you're already saving cash by not buying it fresh, so pony up a little cash, Scrooge McDuck.